I am 22 years old.

I feel like I should have done more with my life by now. I regret doubt, fear, anger, bitterness...and anything else that I let myself be controlled by.

I wish I had done more. I wish I had tried harder, reached further. All I can hope is that God will give me his blessing if I decide now to start living like I should have been living, and start trying like I should have been trying.

Well, I'm back, as I said I would be if out of pure boredom.

I'd rather not give a summary of life seeing as how I tend to be pessimistic no matter what, but I will say that the changes in life that come never cease to astound me. Astound is a good word, right? So far, I'm pretty excited about life, because now at least there is some mystery to it.

I'm sorry I'm coming off as sarcastic in this entry. Mostly, I'm just angry that I let my Xanga blog be my way of reaching out to my friends or to strangers, instead of being brave and coming to them, and being open. I lost my sense of being open somewhere along the way. I'll try to work on it, I promise. I'm also angry that a lot of my friends use their blogs as their main source of mystery venting. You know, the "enigma" entry with only a sentence that makes you wonder if they've survived a suicide attempt recently. So ya. I haven't been too happy with the concept of blogging recently.

Sorry to disappoint. I wish I had something cool to write about.

Well, it was fun while it lasted. I'm bored with Xanga. No one ever writes in theirs enough for it to be interesting...or...some people write in it WAY too much. I'll even admit that I have entries that the world could have done without.

In conclusion, I may write in here again out of boredom, but don't be hopeful. Toodles!